We are all seeking an escape . It ’s that desperate need for the world to slow down , for the people to take a minute , for Republicans to develop an ounce of compassion , Democrats to acquire any sort of backbone , and all us schmucks with zero power to just … take a blessed breath . Animal Crossing , a game where you join a bunch of anthropomorphic beast on an island , is literally a virtual escape from the world . When you show up ready to room the plane that ’s what the two small raccoon even tell apart you . Animal Crossing is meant to be the balm to our anxiousness riddled little lives . Only it sucks beyond quantity .
I am not unfamiliar with Animal Crossing . I unquestionably ignore my friends for hours while they played it and I smoked vodka - spiked hookah back in like 2005 ( do n’t do that ) . I gamely checked it out on the Nintendo DS and gave up when I leave out like two daylight of gameplay and all my in - game friends abandoned me ( do n’t do that either ) . I even expend some clock time with the fluid interpretation of it a few years ago . Most things are jolly consistent from incarnation to embodiment .
You are a human in a public of cartoon animals that speak in a digital rhythm that Nintendo transform into human - speak in text bubble below them . You pull in fruit and bugs and rocks . You build material . You go into massive debt to a bunch of raccoons and work all day and nighttime to pay up off that debt .
I look so fucking stupid.Screenshot: (Animal Crossing)
fuck this guypic.twitter.com/dkvlJj7dBO
— 𝚊𝚕𝚎𝚡 𝚌𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚣 ( @alexhcranz)March 25 , 2020
Which is really my job with this secret plan . Right now the real world we ’d all like a vacation from is run by capitalists with no construct of beneficial socialist economy . Powerful workforce and women think a single$1,200 checkwill make up for months and months of lose income . These people will gladly give trillions to billion - dollar corporations but let hospitals languish . People hunger and children go uneducated .
The earthly concern is already run by the racoon so why on Earth would I need to deal with them in a game ?
Animal Crossing is n’t the only existent - liveliness sim that put you into a plodding interchangeable to the one you probably experience in the actual humanity day - to - day . game like The Sims and Stardew Valley can absolutely feel like work . You get up . You work your butt off . You welcome the perfumed release of slumber at the end of the sidereal day .
But those games are a lot less sharply simulacrums of the capitalist economy you ’re forced to reckon with day by day . By forcing you into a long term and unwilling kinship with a landlord / loanshark raccoon , Animal Crossing is a closer reminder of the world we ’re live in . At a bit when so many folks are clamoring fora rent freeze , the last thing I want to do is head into a simulation where that ’s not even close-fitting to a possibility .
But I did n’t want tangible - biography people in my real - aliveness theatre before a highly transmittable pandemic made stand close or touching hand a veritable strait-laced scandal . Why would I want you on the overgrown island that I am but a villein inhabiting ?
So , even though I ’ve only played 5 moment of the biz and done little more than raise a collapsible shelter on a patch of acres I do not own , I can safely say Animal Crossing sucks and Stardew Valley rulez .
Animal CrossingVideo game
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